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Information for Parents
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Tips for easing the transition |
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Recognising the signs of student distress |
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What to do |
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Faculty of Life and Social Sciences - Parents Orientation Program: Dail-up or Broadband |
Starting university can be a challenging
time for some students, especially for those who are the first
in their family to go to a university, and also for those
who come from backgrounds that are different from those usually
represented in tertiary education. The differences between
school and university can seem confusing for parents and students,
particularly if no brothers, sisters, cousins or friends have
undertaken tertiary education before.
When they enter university, your son or daughter will be
required to take on new responsibilities - they will become
responsible for taking a proactive approach to learning, managing
their study/work/social schedules, forming new networks and
friends, and pursuing a career goal. This time can be as daunting
for parents as it is for students – it can be hard to
recognise what level of involvement you should now have in
your son’s or daughter’s tertiary education.
Tips for easing the transition:
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Keep the lines of communication open.
Ask questions about their studies – it’s
all about being supportive and interested. |
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Be aware that your son’s or
daughter’s university experience is a balance
between studying and socialising. Give them gentle encouragement
about managing their time effectively and how to plan
ahead |
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Encourage them to develop new friendships.
They’ll benefit greatly from getting to know other
first year students, and from realising that they are
not alone. |
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Allow them to manage their own administrative
issues. Don’t contact the University on behalf
of your son or daughter unless in exceptional circumstances
or in an emergency, as the University protects its’
students privacy and therefore cannot disclose information
to parents. |
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Respect their subject choices to
demonstrate directly that you regard them as a young
adult who is capable of making important decisions on
their own. |
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Recognise that the responsibilities
that comes with university study rest with your son
or daughter. Remind them that there are staff and support
services available to help in situations of need. |
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Step back – but be there for
them |
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Recognising the signs of student distress
While all parents wish to see their sons/daughters succeed,
there will invariably be some students who struggle to cope
in the university environment for a number of reasons. While
it is important to respect the independence of students if
they do not wish to discuss every single aspect of their university
life and study with you, it is important to be aware of some
typical signs of distress that will require intervention:
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lack of educational goals (or clarity
of educational goals), without any attempt to seek guidance; |
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lack of friendship networks; |
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disinterest in enrolled course, or
feigned disinterest (when not experiencing academic
success); |
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not attending classes on a regular
basis; |
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not completing and submitting assignments; |
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unwillingness to discuss
university, classes and progress (including grades); |
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not sitting examinations |
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failing to enrol; |
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excessive socialising |
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taking on too much paid employment
(more than 10 hours per week); and, |
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low self esteem |
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What to do
It is not students alone who face challenges when they commence
university; many parents are also challenged by the experience.
Below are some suggestions to help parents cope with this
period of significant change:
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expect the unexpected – the
freedom of a university environment can encourage some
students to spread their wings and sometimes in undesirable
ways e.g. dress sense, tattoos, body piercings etc; |
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recognise that success at VCE may
not necessarily translate to equivalent success in the
first year at university – grades may drop while
students adjust to their new environment; |
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acknowledge that universities have
changes significantly, especially over the last decade
– for this reason, comparisons with your own experiences
may not be as valid as you may have thought; |
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recognise that university grades
operate on a very different scale to grades achieved
in secondary school; |
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trust your daughter/son’s decision-making,
even if choices made are different from your own; |
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try and be empathetic
if your son/daughter makes a poor decision that turns
out badly – work together to resolve the difficulty
without apportioning blame; |
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maintain interest in your daughter/son’s
university experience, appreciating that many issues
and challenges that students face in their first year
at university may be identified by other names but still
come under the umbrella of ‘transition’,
i.e., adjustment to the university environment; |
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celebrate your daughter/son’s
achievements. |
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